This blog is an attempt to air an alternative view regarding homosexuality. I am a 26yo guy who has grown up with homosexual feelings. I am frustrated with the answers that I have been offered, and with how others perceive me in relation to this. Through telling a little about my life, my thoughts, reflections and conclusions I want to give some space to an alternative view on homosexuality. I hope that what I offer could cause you to think again. Thanks for taking the time to read my blog.

Friday, February 10, 2006

What's best??

I've got work in the morning - I don't generally enjoy my job. It's 1.12am, I could really do with the sleep, especially since I have a bad cold, and will have to stay awake during a whole day of training tomorrow.

We don't always do what we know to be best for us......

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Token "gay" friends!

I was out for lunch with some friends just now. It was kind of interesting. Only one of them knows that I'm "gay". At one point after discussing other random topics, homosexuality came up. One of my friends has quite a way with words and he's not shy in expressing his opinions. I like him a lot (but not in that way)! After declaring that homosexuality was a mental illness, and that it was rife in Israel, he informed us of "a friend of his" who is a Christian and gay. He explained how the guy had been healed, and it was all in his past now.

I really appreciate my mate, and am not offended by his views. I find them humorous. I agree with what he said to some degree, but his way of expression is far from helpful.

Does everyone have a token "gay" friend? And use him to validate their opinions on the topic? I'm sure others have used me in that way!! Oh well, they are generally well meaning!

Monday, January 23, 2006

A pleasant day

I had a good day today. Spent some time with friends early on, then had lunch with my parents. It was my Christmas present to them i.e. I told them on Christmas day that I would take them out for a meal in the New Year. It meant I could avoid shopping, but they also seemed to appreciate it more. Having a meal with them isn't always easy for me - so it was a bit of a sacrifice too.

I then watched Man U beat Liverpool with a last minute goal from Rio!! I cleaned the kitchen in the evening, before going for a drink with a mate. I then watched John Higgins beat Ronnie O'Sullivan on the final black in the Masters Snooker Final!! Oh, how I love to see Ronnie lose!

After a great day like that, I sometimes wonder why I find some days so tough :)

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

What I believe about homosexuality.

I have come to believe a number of things about homosexuality. They are part of my “alternative view”. I thought I would set these out at the start of this blog, just so you can have a good idea of where I am coming from. Over time I will explain why I believe what I do. I have, what I believe to be, considered, rational reasons.

I believe the following:

  • No one is born gay - in the sense that no matter what happens in their life they will be attracted to the same sex;
  • Relatedly, there is no such thing as a gay gene – in terms of a gene that if someone has then they are definitely gay;
  • Homosexuality primarily develops as someone grows up due mainly to relational, emotional factors;
  • Genetic factors can have an impact, yet not a determining influence;
  • Homosexuality isn’t a choice that someone makes one day, but this doesn’t mean that it must be intrinsic to the individual;
  • Our society’s acceptance of homosexuality is superficial. Many betray their true opinion in how they joke about homosexual guys behind their backs;
  • It is possible for someone to resolve the factors that influenced their homosexuality, and hence develop heterosexual desires and have their homosexual desires diminish - yet I admit that this is not easy, and it is unwise to search after at all costs;
  • I am no worse than anyone else due to the fact that I have homosexual feelings;
  • A guy is very unlikely to gain continued happiness and contentment in a relationship with another guy, yet I admit that some men may find this - please let me know if you have;
Due to the above, I believe that it is best for me to not pursue the homosexual desires that I have. Instead, I choose to invest in good friendships with other guys, and seek to resolve the factors in my own life that have contributed to my homosexual desires. I hope that one day I may meet a beautiful girl, fall in love, get married and have kids. But even if I don't, I know I will be more content without going after all that gay culture has to offer me.

Monday, January 16, 2006

Ok, here goes...

So, I've decided to write a blog. I've a sense of anticipation, but also of trepidation. This is important to me. I want to be clear and considered in what I write. I don't wish to be misunderstood nor misinterpreted, but nevertheless such is likely to occur.

I'll just do my best to be honest. That's all anyone can expect, and that's all the pressure I'll place on myself.

Well, enough of the precursor - HERE WE ARE. My little blog. I'm going to tell you about me; about how my life has been; about how it has challenged me; about how it has pained me; about my hopes and aspirations, about my views and considerations.

An important (in terms of this blog, but not so in terms of who I am) point that I don't know the best way to express... There's various ways to say it. Most simply, I have grown up with homosexual feelings.
I will elaborate on this in this blog. I'll do my best to give the view that I have come to. It's an "alternative view" to the one we generally get in today's media and society in general. Please give it some thought, and let me know what you think...

I think that's enough for my first posting! Over the next while I'll fill you in more on me, and more on this view that I have. As time passes, you'll get more of the picture.